Location, Panama Joes, Gainesville, FL.
Time Frame: Many years
1. A really drunk woman (around my age), grinding against the bar asking a guy in a drunken southern slur "I'm looking for a real man, are you a real man?"
-Really? What can this guy possibly say? "No, I'm not a real man?"
2. Drunk guy to friend: "Did you take pretty lessons?" Followed every five minutes by yelling at her "Stop it!" and "Stop being so pretty!"
-Note to Guys: While this is one of the lamest lines I have heard in a while, it was also kind of cute the first time. After that, your just annoying.
3. A drunk girl slapping the beer out of her boyfriends hand and slapping him repeatedly. Followed later by her threatening my friend with "I know tae kwon do"
-My response: "I will ghetto beat your ass."
4. Drunk guy to me: "Will you read me a book?"
-Still not sure if he was picking on me for wearing glasses or being naughty...?
5. A drunk girl manages to fall out of her chair twice (TWICE!) in one night. And by fall I don't mean stumbled out of, I mean sitting in her chair like normal to laying on the ground still in her seated position.
-One week later, I am still laughing uncontrollably while she glares at me.
6. Drunk girl, whose name shall not be mentioned, that spent the first part of the night with Sailor Jerry declaring: "Momma is drunkity drunk drunk!" followed shortly by: "why would he go home when he could have all of thisssss..."
-DISCLAIMER: Sailor Jerry is not your friend... He pretends to be your friend and then he sneaks up on you, hits you over the head, and makes you say and do really stupid stuff that you will later be mocked about... Or so I heard.
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