Call Me Old Fashioned...

I have a dear friend, who I love very much, who is convinced the key to my dating life is through the eharmony dating website. Most times when I mention improving my love life, I know she will mention me joining eharmony. Today, I gave in and checked out what eharmony had to offer in terms of online dating. While I am still not interested in spending $40 a month on a monthly membership (we all know I would rather spend that money on shoes, bags or drinks at the bar), I was pleasantly surprised by the amount of available articles for people to read to improve their chances at finding love. A little unknown scoop about me, I love self help articles! From laying sod to getting laid, I will read about it! So I settled in with a glass of wine and decided to indulge myself in some light reading. I ran across an article called "Six Things We Miss About Old Fashioned Dating", grabbed my soapbox and started typing.

Slow Down

The article reminds us that our Grandparents did not jump into relationships, they took their time and courted each other and chances are, your Grandparents are still together. Sure they also walked miles barefoot in the snow just to get to school, but really it’s their dating skills that should be admired.

I Want to Hold Your Hand

As the article pointed out, the Beatles said it best "I wanna hold your hand" and I can actually remember a time when holding hands was a big deal. Remember this? Sitting in the movie and making sure your hand closest to your date was available on your lap just close enough to be held. And the electricity as your hands got closer and closer. I even remember the first time my first love grabbed my hand to hold it and that spark I felt. Nowadays, chances are if you met in the club and danced, your body has made so much contact, bumping and grinding, getting low, holding hands is nothing.

Let's Go Steady

A nice way to avoid the whole awkward "what are we/where are we going?" conversation that is almost always started by women. Why is it that guys don't really need to know what/where you are as a couple? Is the promise ring our generations version of the going steady pin? If so, this is important: Unless you are in high school or early college, the promise ring is unacceptable. I see it this way, if you present me with a promise ring, the only thing you need to promise me is it is not actually a promise ring. As I am sure most females will agree, we are fine going slowly and going along for the ride (some rides taking longer than others) as long the ride has been mapped out at some point and we know where our final destination is.

When "Making Love" Meant Something Else

The article focuses on how "making love" meant more than the sexual act. Basically how men would woo women with their words and actions. I would like to focus on the last time someone actually said "we made love" Even couples who are crazy in love and connected at the hip do not say "made love". While I am on the subject, I hate when people call their significant others "Lover." When you say "lover" I am automatically transported to a place I do not need to be. Your bedroom. So, please stop.

One on One

I can actually get on board 100% with the article on this one. Basically, leave all of your technology devices out of the picture. If you are on a date, you should be focused on that date, not checking your facebook, tweeting, or checking the game score. You should be able to disconnect from the world long enough to enjoy someones company. I mean c’mon, a nice McDonalds dinner is roughly thirty minutes… Note to self: up standards.

Clear Intentions

The article states that there was a time when a guy asked you out because he liked you. And since he asked you knew he was interested. There was no wishy washy business. No “He’s Just Not into You” books or wait three days to call rules. I am sure there was still the great girl talk of “do you think he is thinking about me” but surely the “Well, we went out, hooked up, he cried about his mom, and then I did the walk of shame to my car… Do you think he will call?” conversations were limited. If you liked each other you made it clear, without removing your clothes. Need ways to show your interested? Put your shirt back on and see all above.

Cliff-Notes version of the blog:
1. Granny and Gramps still got it!
2. Promise ring = no good
3. Don’t say “lover”
4. Don’t answer that text.
5. Don’t play games.

Bachelorette Soapbox

I wasn't a big fan of Ashley during Brads season and did not think she was the best choice, but I also wasn't a huge fan of Jillian Harris during Jason Mesnick's season, and I loved her after her season of the Bachelorette, so I thought I would give her a chance. So far, I have not been impressed with her instincts. In fact, I am pretty sure if I hear her say Bentley's name one more time I will throw something. And yes, I am moving anything breakable from my reach before Monday's episode.

So here are random thoughts (some would say rants) from this weeks episode:

Did I miss the episode where Bentley and Ashley actually bonded? I mean c'mon she hadn't even had a one on one date with the guy! Were his kisses that good? Did she get the good loving and we missed it?

<------ THIS GUY SUCKS. I swear if any guy ever leaves me with "dot. dot. dot." I will punch him in the forehead? Where did this saying come from, who do I have to hurt?

How many time has she told the guys to be 100% honest with her but at the same time she is harboring these deep (unfounded) feelings for Bentley. I mean, what a double standard here!

How does the guy Ashley end up with feel watching her pine for Bentley? I can imagine he would have a little complex about Bentley after watching this. I am sure Ashley has some explaining to do! And yes, I read the spoilers, and know who it is she picks at the end, and I feel for him. Watching this crap cannot be easy.

How bad is it that I am looking forward to the guys laying into her when she tells them Bentley is back? I hope the previews aren't misleading and they really lay into her.

I REALLY hope Bentley actually attends the Men Tell All and doesn't flake out like most of the hated on guys in the past have done... I am looking at you Wes and Justin "Rated R".

Don't get me wrong, I am sure we have all been attracted to someone who was not good for us, so I am trying to not hate on her there, especially since she has not seen all the horrible things he has said about her, so I am trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, but this is getting insane.

If all of this Bentley closure nonsense doesn't get squared up next week, I am really going to consider skipping out on the rest of the season.

Am I the only one who thinks Ben F. is the most boring person in the world? I mean, if he wasn't a wine maker I would have no interest in him. But since he is a wine maker... Call me!



I wish Ashley would stop thanking the guys for continuing on this journey with her. Who wouldn't want to travel, stay in fabulous places, and go on all sort of adventures on ABC's dime? Ignore the fact that the girl you are dating is dating 15 other guys, and it is a perfect vacation!


Wow, Ashley was warned by Michelle Money about Bentley and she still let him stay (and has whined about him for 5 episodes now)but William says Ben C. was looking forward to internet dating and she booted him out like it was nothing. I think most of us can agree with Ben C's total look of confusion.

Speaking of William: Preempting something with "I don't want to throw the guy under the bus" and then completely throwing him under the bus does not make it better.

Ryan is really becoming annoying. Watching him push Williams bags out the door with a big smile on his face just up'd his tool shed membership.

And in closing, I have one request. More JP!!!